I fucked up

I admit it. I’m human, I make mistakes.

However, lately, i’ve made several mistakes. Ones that have cost me friendships, and also irreparably damaged relationships with a certain family member.

I’d be lying if I said I didn’t regret both of them. because I do. I am aware however, that both of them are now unfixable. I’ve considered contacting the friends that i’ve lost to try and make up. One of them, however, I know either will not reply, or will tell me to get lost, and the other friend, i’m unsure about.

As for the family member, the only thing i’ll say is that i’ve been told they would have asked me to move out by now if this virus hadn’t been going around. So in 18 months or so, I guess i’ll be homeless. To be quite honest, I feel like ending my life somehow. For the last few nights, I’ve thought about just going out at night, and spending it down the beach.

Maybe everyone would be better off if I were gone.

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